Me 'arl Fella's Shouts 5
Me 'arl Fella's Shouts 5 |
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We want you to let us know what the fans shout at the match, now or in the past. You all know a fan who sits near you & gives the team or ref the verbal's. Or maybe that fan is you. Let us know what you shout. There is a fan who sits through the match, & says nothing, until something happens & he explodes. Let us know what he shouts. We want the funny shouts. We want the emotional shouts. We want the dick 'ed shouts. We want to be alone! So send them in to Me 'arl fella's shouts 500. Vs Coventry, must have been '96 or '97. Coventry are warming up well before kick off, and some Sky Blue yard dog hoofs a ball waywardly into the the Paddock, former England 'legend' John Salako comes over to retrieve the ball. This enormous Blue stands up, with the ball in his left hand and whips his dick out with his right, shakes his member in the general direction of the player and shouts "Suck this Salako!". I have never seen anyone look so incredulous in my life, Salako just stood there like a Guppy out of water. He had a 'mare of a game, nothing unusual in that, though I'm sure the shock of the cock can't have helped. A priceless moment! Lard Arse Dawson. (03/09/03) 499. PARK END AGES AGO WHEN WE HAD THE FRENCH GIMP GINOLA. GRAVESEN AND GINOLA ARE WARMING UP ON THE SIDELINE, TALKING AND LAUGHING. A FELLA BEHIND ME SHOUTS "GINOLA! YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T DISCUSS HAIR PRODUCTS WITH HIM. HE'S FUCKIN BALD!" FUCKN FUNNY,CALLUM. (03/09/03) 498. At Colin Harvey's testamonial, everyones taking the piss out of Bologna's Smit singing "You're Smit and you know you are". Girlfriend asks who Smit is so I point him out. Guy in row behind points at Alexanderson and says "you see that blonde? He's smit as well!". Piss Funny. Eli. (03/09/03) 497. Was in the upper gwladys at the arsenal game wen jeffers came on and was pissing everybody off ! This fella was sitting with his kid who was about 9 who was getting very upset and said to his dad " i feel like throwing this drink at that jeffers " and held his coke up . His dad reached into his pocket grabbed aloud of copper and give it to his son and said "throw these they hurt more "! The child didnt realise his dad was joking and threw a 2p that didnt even reach the lower gwladys but it still made a few laffs the father wasnt impressed though ! class site lads keep it up ! Blue Blood. (03/09/03) 496. I think it was last season or the season before in the usual everton vs fulham brawl when weir was squaring up to one of the fulham boys when all of a sudden some arl fella who hadnt spoke or moved all game stood up and shouted " fucking kill him davey " ! That kept me and me mates laughin for thee rest of the game ! Chris. (03/09/03) 495. At the Preston friendly last week when over at the dugout scot gemmil and mark pembridge were warmin up. all of a sudden the man behind shouts "fuckin hell moyes i bet there quakin in the boots now eh." Alan. (22/08/03) 494. At the newcastle game a few years back me an me mates were in the back of the lower gladwys. 4 scottish fellas sittin abar 2 or 3 rows in front of us were pissed as farts. one of em stood up an sed "shearer your da takes it up the a*** " we started laughin and then his mate stud up an sed "so dus he you bell " the game woz shit an me mates agree that it was the best part of our day. always a blue 4eva. fatkev. (22/08/03) 493.
I heard this at the Colchester FA Cup 6th Rd match at Goodison in
1971. We were winning 5-0 and looking more classy than a model on
a Milan catwalk. 492.
At the Crewe friendly Gemmill was his usual piss-poor self (not the
only one) and he absolutely scythed a Crewe player down in the centre
circle about 10 minutes after the ball had gone. I stood up and shouted
'send him off!'. The funny thing was about 70 other people all shouted
it at the same time. Not just me who thinks he's crap then? Bignije
- Wigan. (22/09/03) 491.
Me and my son Martin was at the Fulham game. We were winning by one
with a few minutes to go when we got a free kick. Unsy had the ball
in his hands and was wasting a bit of time, much to the annoyance
of one Fulham player. Suddenly the Fulham lad grabs the ball off Unsy,
slams it on the floor and shouts for him to get on with it. The whole
of the Bullens Road side shouted "Ooooh!" in unison, as
Vic Reeves does on Shooting stars with the handbags! We just fell
about laughing as the Fulham lad sank into the grass... 490. Crewe game again Rhino just about to take a throw in and some lad yells go ed slim! even Unsey chuckled to himself! Creevy. (15/08/03) 489. At the Crewe friendly game a fella behind me shouts: "Bloody Hell Rooney. Ya've fucked up the Brylcreem contract now 'aven't ya? John Noble. (15/08/03) 488. I was at the Leicester game at Filbert Street a few years back in the Leicester end. A Leicester player went down injured just as a Foxes fan stood up to go to the bog. The fan turned around and asked who it was. Another fan said "It's Heskey" to which he replied "Oh good, I've got time for a shit then". John Harris. (15/08/03) 487.
it was the pre season friendly against crewe this year and we were
2-0 down. Gemmill was trotting back up towards our 18 yard box and
one of the crewe players was running up the near wing towards our
goal. someone a bit further down from me stood up and shouted "oi
gemmil, its that fella in the red" everyone was laughing and
it was the funniest thing i have heard at a football match since the
west brom game away last season. Jon Martin. (26/07/03) 485. After the Cup final in 95, going down Wembley Way, a massive police horse slobbered all over a celebrating Evertonian. "Don't worry mate" commented his pal "he's kissed worse". John Harris. (26/07/03) 484. last season, think it was the villa game, ferguson had just come on and flapped in front of goal, much to the dismay of the lacosté clad kidda next to me, who shouted "FUCK OFF FERGUSON, U'VE DONE NOTHIN THIS YEAR, APART FROM FIGHT CRIME!" the jiggerrabbit. (26/07/03) 483.
Can't remember which game it was last season. But on the road next
to Stanley Park after the game the road was full with everyone leaving
to get to the car park and a police van was doing a 3 point turn to
go back towards Goodison amongst all the crowd . I heard someone in
the crowd say "Poor copper. Thats bad timing having to take his
police driving test now." 482. Last season away at 'boro, i went wiv ma mates, Pete, Pete Snr. and Jonathan. There was a fat fella behind us, Uriah Rennie wernt givin many decisions our way and the fat bastard shouts "FUCK OFF URIAH! YOU'RE GIVIN' ME INDEGESTION!" Class!!!!!!! Cheerz, Ste Willetts BLUE4EVER. (22/07/03) 481.
A few seasons back we beat West Ham 4-0 away. That horrible twat Barmby
scored a hattrick. The ref, Paul Alcock, was having an absolute shocker
as usual and after about the tenth ridiculous decision some fat bastard
next to me starts singing, "All cock no brain, all cock no brain,
all cock no brain..." etc. Ade, Manchester. (22/07/03) 479. Sittin in main stand last game of the season against man utd. everytime beckem came down the falnk this mad guy behind me stood up n shoute "I hate you Beckham! Everone round me starts laffin their ed off the 1st time but after about 5 the guy nxt to me stands up n says to im "shut up u now. it aint finny". Feidhlim White. (22/07/03) 478.
In the Park End last season at the memorable 2-1 win
against Arsenal where Rooney scored THAT goal. Henry was by the corner
flag were the away end meets the Park End an out of the blue, this
fella who hadnt said a word all game gets up out of his chair, and
shouts out, and he shouts it the way I spell it "Terry Henri,
your SHIT lad!!!!!!!" Well, everyone just burst out laughing,
I dont think he realised why though, that was the funniest part!!!!!!! 476. I remember a couple of ace shouts from the Lower Gladwys on one of Nyarko's appearances just before That Arsenal Game. Nyarko was looking like he wasn't interested as usual, it was a cold day and some wag behind us shouts 'Ey yer can tell e's fuckin soft! E's wearin short sleeves an e's got gloves on!! Later on Nyarko was taken off to a few boos and the same bloke piped up 'I'm not clappin 'im I'm clappin the paramedics!!! We all fell about both times. Steve Rankin. (17/07/03) 475.
sitting in the paddock a couple of years ago, bloke next to me patently
didnt like Daniel Dichio, after he was flagged offside and trundled
back to the halfway line protesting with the lineseman, the bloke
next to me rises to his feet and shouts 'you where a furlong offside
Dichi-Head, now f##k off', not a murmur in house though, i thought
he was mad as a box of /monkeys. 474.
Arsenal V Everton a few years ago. We got well beat by classy Arsenal
team. I remember a few moments from this encounter; Unsworth making
Ray Parlour look like Alan Wells down the right flank and Baka-ono
trying in vain to take on the entire Arse backline everytime the ball
came to him. But the guy next to me, and two of his classic shouts
is what sticks out. I'm sitting at the front of the mainstand minding
my own business. Then mid-way thru the second half this half-bake
decides to sit next to the vacant seat, vacated by a season-ticket
holder, right beside me. Clearly intoxictaed he begins to berate Arsenal's
french contigent at every breaking moment. Then, after a Viera assualt
on Olivier Dacourt, he stands to shout: "Fuck-Off Vieira, you
lanky, dirty, froggy bastard!" Then he sits down, play continues...
Dacourt makes his accumstomed bookable retaliation on Viera. The ignorant
fool next to me arrises again: "Fuckin great tackle Dacourt."
Towards the end of the game the fella appeases his ignorant self when
during a long injury time lull, exclaimes in vintage Scouse tongue,
"Keown ye mother is a horse." Classic! Great Site! 473. it was last season against Newcastle Utd an stubbsy had just gone down by the street end coz woodgate had kicked him in the head, so he was stood there thinkin he was mad coz he was talkin to wayne when some fella shouted 'Yer ur used to kickin people in the head woodgate' i found it funny anyway !!!ONCE A BLUE ALWAYS A BLUE !!!EVERTON 4EVA!!! Jane. (06/07/03) 472.
It was last season against Arsenal need i say anymore. It was just
after Seaman had let anorther soft goal in for England. So he was
getting abuse hurled at him anyway. It was the first half and I was
in the Street End. The end Seaman was keeping goal and the fans had
been having a go at him all game, but Seaman was just ignoring them
and paying no attention. Then someone near the front stood up and
shouted 'Hey Seaman! There's been murder in our house. Me sister wants
her bobble back!' Seaman turned round and grinned to a face full of
abuse from our end. the Gwladys wiped the grin off his face. Class.
O yeah brilliant website. once a blue always a blue!! Keith
Alexander. (26/06/03) 469.
I was sitting in the Upper Bullens some time ago, watching the worst
match ever, against Luton (I think it may have been the last before
the St End was seated, but I digress). Felling extremely annoyed as
our former USA, 5 a side player fell over once again, I finally lost
my patience and shouted "Oh Prickie you fu**ing prek." Needless
to say, I felt like a right prek. 466.
Man Utd at home this season 2003. Was sat in the Gwladys Street end
when Van Nistelroy, the dirty diving twat, was stood about 10 yards
away from us, he'd just missed a chance when my mate stood up and
shouted "FUCK OFF, MR ED" which was quickly followed by
a horse noise. Had everyone round us in stitches.p.s great site boys.
Bluenose Dan. (21/05/03) 464.
Leicester last year sitting in the Park End some bloke shouts to their
goalie, Walker, "eh Walker! Is yer dad still on the dole ?"
We all crack up, but Walker turned round laffin and nodded. Good on
him. But then the bloke shouts back "Well fuck off and get yer
hair cut. you scruffy twat !" shut him right up. brilliant.
Gary Dunne. (21/05/03) 460.
About 5 minutes from the end of the match v Villa April 2003, the
ball is flicked on by Duncan Ferguson (come on you must remember him)
in the direction of 'super' Kevin Campbell. He turns to reach the
flick on and falls flat on his arse. A lad about 4 seats along from
me in the upper Gwladys shouts 'Friggin hell, Campbell. I wish my
missus went down as often as you' !! 459. Chelsea at home,a couple of seasons ago,blues two-one up,after falling behind. Cadamarteri receives the ball out wide,deep in Chelsea's half,with about a minute left.He gets various shouts of "hold!","get down to the corner flag!" and "play it off him for a throw!",Unable to stand the tension any longer,a fella behind me in the Street End bellowed "OH FUCK IT,JUST RUN WITH IT YER DAFT LITTLE BASTARD!".Everyone who heard it was in stitches.Love the site,lads. Andrew Hill. (09/05/03) 458. Sat in the Gwladys Street with one of me muckers. Everton had just bought the unstoppable Bakayoko. One arl fella about seventy blurts out "FOUR AND A ALF MILLION FOR BAKAYOKO......WE COULD HAVE GOT JOHN AND YOKO FOR THAT!!!". One of the best shouts I've ever heard at Goodison Park..... Ravo Junior. (09/05/03) 457. We were sitting watching the teams warm up before the dire Fulham farce, when some geezer shouts to Simmonsen "Hey lad you weren't to blame for the Shewsbury game" to which Sreve replies " of course I wasn't I didn't play" - cue red faced fan and the rest of us pissing ourselves laughing at him. Neil Davies. (09/05/03) 456. Can't recall which year it was, only that Colin Harvey was manager and I think we were playing Derby County. I was sat in the Bullens Road with me Arl Fella, the place was half full and you could hear a pin drop. Next minute me Arl Fella stood up and shouted "HEY, KEEP THE FRIGGIN NOISE DOWN IN THAT CHURCH WE'RE TRYIN TO PLAY FOOTBALL IN HERE". The whole section fell about laughin... Courtesy of RAVO junior...(09/05/03) 455.
At the Newcastle match a few weeks ago robert had just scored a wonderful
equaliser of wayne rooney's opener, when we attacked almost instantly
after and unsworth done a nice little bit of one touch passin (about
4 or 5) when someone behind me startin laffin an shouted "what's
goin on, pembo and undies are givin it one touch there" it was
a classic. 454. Was at the Chelsea (when we got hammered 3-1) game in the corner of the Lower Gwladys and Main Stand when John Terry came out to train by the corner flag. Cue abuse "Eh Terry next rounds on me" "do ya fancy a bar brawl later??" Good job he didnt react!!! Corky. (03/05/03) 453.
Dont u just love sitting behind the goal in the Gladwys Street? It
was the Newcastle game, and Bellamy chases down yet another ball which
goes over the byeline. As the dirty Welsh midget turns to walk there
is a sudden complete silence and some clown hollers at the top of
his voice, "FUCK OFF BELLAMY YOU FUCKING HUNCHBACK." Bellamy
well heard it and the crowd erupted, but the best thing is if you
look at him carefully, he does actually appear to have a hunchback.
Excellent! 452. Home to Newcastle april, 2003: Clair Jane Sweeney comes on at half time to do a presentation to Rat; "Get your tits out for the lads" rings out from the Park End. Paul Askew. (03/05/03) 451. At this season's home game against Arsenal, two shouts from the bloke next to me. It was David Seaman's first game since he let that goal in from a corner, playing for England. The announcer was giving us the team selections, "The Everton substitute goal keeper is Paul Gerrard." Straight away this guy's on his feet shouting, "He's even worse than HIM!" and points at Seaman. Priceless. His last offering was at the end of the game, Wayne had just scored that wonder goal. Somehow during all the noise this fella heard his mobile go off. There he was jumping up and down with the rest of us and shouting down the phone, "Can't talk now love the whole place has gone mental." Got to be the quote of the season. Thom. (03/05/03) 450.
When i was a Junior Blue i would sit, pissing myself, laughing at
some of the comments heard coming from the stands! I don't recall
the game but, one Saturday, Andrei Kanchelskis was having a blinder!
He's taking the ball down the wing with it sticking to his feet like
glue and making a mug of the fullback. We were all in awe, when some
funny bastard sat next to me in 449.
Peter
Shilton was in goal for Southampton after being in the paper for a
domestic with his missus. Some wag in the St.End shouts "eh Shilton
yer bastard. It's a pity yer didn't hit Maradonna as hard as yer hit
yer missus". Shilton never turned round but raised a hand in
acknowledgement -fair play. Big Dave. (28/04/03)
446. At the Leyton orient game (gazza taken the piss) fat arssss Unsworth cocks up again and some guy in the main stand stands up and shouts out at the top of his voice "'F**kin ell' 10/10 Unsworth 10/10". Sean Joyce. (28/04/03) 445. Cast your mind back to Deidre's love for Samir in Coronation Street. One game in Mike Walkers reign Vinny Samways got the ball and a shout went go up from the back of the Gwladys Street Upper, " I love you Deidre" in an arab accent. Brilliant!!!! Steve. N. (03/04/03) 444. A good few years ago - I think 1996ish'. Wimbledon at home. Fella in the lower gwladys heckling Neil Sullivan in their goal all the way through the first half. With the ball at the other end, and the crowd quiet - he stands up and shouts - 'Sullivan - I've shagged your wife'!! To which Sullivan promptly turns round and shouts back - 'I'm not married' with a big smile on his face. He duly received a standing ovation and wiped the smile of the fella's face who never opened his mouth for the rest of the game. john coyne. (03/04/03) 433.
In
the Park End on Saturday against the Ammer's, ref, Mark Halsey having
another sub standard game, blows for something and gives a freekick
to Joey Cole, a shout from behind "Halsey I hope your dog dies",
followed with an apology to those people surrounding "I had to
say something and its what came into my head, I like dogs". It
sort of summed up the game. Mark. (03/04/03) As the whole crowd burst into uproar a female steward with peroxide streaks approached and told him to sit down. "F*ck off you! Come back once you've dyed the rest of yer hair." Again the whole crowd was in bulk. As she skulked
off a big copper appeared brandishing his truncheon. As he approached
the cheeky wag shouts to him "And you can f*ck off an all".
The officer walked straight up to him and reached into his pockets
for what we all feared were his handcuffs, but instead he produced
a yellow card and held it aloft Pierluigi Collina style. It was pure
pantomime, both sets of fans were in stitches. Steve
Mc. (03/04/03) 430.
At the 'ammers game. "Watch out Kanoute the tide's coming in"
- unknown Park End funster. Steve Mc. (21/03/03) 427.
Match against Spurs (too long ago to remember) PA system announcer
is running through the teams prior to kick off. As he reaches the
end of the 11 Spurs players he announces 'And the substitute for Tottenham
Hotspur today is Justin Edinburgh' Couldn't resist it and had to shout
out, 'He'll never make it for the kick off!' Gary. (21/03/03) 425. Back in the late 70s, Ipswich Town at Goodison given Everton a sound thrashing. Paul Mariner is shouting various tactics to his team mates as Ipswich prepare to take a corner. This bloke infront of us shouts, "Hey! Mariner! There's women and children trying to sleep here." Thom Lester. (01/03/03) 424. During the Southampton game the Rad get's dragged down in the first half infront of the park end. After the subsequent roars for a penalty, and the resulting booking and free kick which Unsy blasted into the wall a bloke behind me shouts "Ellerey you baldy prick, Fuck off back to ref school not fucking high school". Mally Reading Evertonian. (01/03/03) 423.
Southampton game, rooney was coming off after warming up at half time,
and the cheerleaders were dancing, and the lad behind shouted we saw
you looking wayne and he laughed. Brill! Scott Parrish. (01/03/03)
421. i was sitting the Gladys against Leeds this season. It was just after leeds sold Woodgate and all the chants about Risdale and being sold in the morning echoed around the ground . The guy behind me stands up and shouts ' Dya wanna loan??' classic! Paul Ryan. (01/03/03) 420. Back in about 1992, me and me mates where reading the programme, when suddenly one of me mates pipped up with - "eeurgh, fuckin look at that on the front of the programme, Maurice Johnson has got a hard on." This is also the same lad who for years shouted "Heeeeeeroooo, heeeeeeeroooo" when he shouldve been shouting "Keeeeeeeoooown Keeeeeeeeeeoooown" and who was more impressed with the Lambourghinis in Basic Instinct rather than Sharon Stones pussy. Stuart "When Was Harry Leyland When The Ball Was In The Net Half Way Round The Goalpost With His Feet Around His Neck" Mackinnon. (22/02/03) 419. I was at an Everton Vs Southampton game a few years back, real shit game back in the days of Walter. Jason Dodd scored a screamer before Ball equalised from the penalty spot late on. Anyway, Hassan Kachloul came over to take a corner and the guy sitting next to me stands up and shouts ' HOW MUCH FOR THE CARPET' . That was the probably the highlight of the game!!!!! Paul Kearns. (22/02/03) 418. At the leeds game last week harry kweull had a shot and it went well wide and a fella a few rows back from me stands up and pulls a tenner out of his pocket and shouts " hey risdale put that in your tranfers kitty it was class. john phippard (22/02/03) 417. FELLA BEHIND OBVIOUSLY NOT A KEVIN CAMPBELL FAN WELL WE TRAILING 3-2 TO SPURS AT WHITE HART ;ANE AND THE CUNT SHOUT THIS IS FUCKING CAMPBELL FAULT THIS AND CAMPBELL WAS NOT EVEN ON THE BENCH. I WAS IN BULK. FROM STE SHERRO. (22/02/03) 416. Sitting in the paddock in 1999, think it was against Villa, and me m8 Danny took a dislike to yet another shit performance from Richard Dunne, as Dunney walked forward to take a throw in Danny shouted "Dunne ya shit, fuck off and sign for Scunthorpe!"....the irishman almost burst into tears! Kris 'Everton Boy' Hutch. (22/02/03) 415.We
were at this press conference the other day and this french bloke
with big, boggly eyes said "we have turned the corner".
Well we all fell about laughing. Robbie Rae. (18/02/03) 413. I was sitting in the Gwladys during are terrible defeat by Tranmere in 2001, but despite my pain I couldn't help but laugh when some fella shouted at the Tranmere goalie, John Achterberg "OI RUBIX CUBE HEAD, F**K OFF BACK TO BIRKENHEAD BEFORE WE USE YA HEAD LIKE A DRUM!".....me and me mate laughed so much, then they scored the third, so the laughter stopped! Kris 'Everton Boy' Hutch. (18/02/03) 412. At the Blackburn game about 5 years ago Blackburn were currently bottom of the table but had just gone 2-1 up against us, Some kid shouts at the top of his voice "At least we'r not going down!!!" the reply of "Don't count on it kid" came from the fella sitting behind me and me dad. Pretty funny at the time. Blue4Ever-ton. (18/02/03) 411. funniest was when we played leeds a few years back, gunna halle came to take a throw by the boys in the paddock next to the away fans, all of a sudden " oy halle go and club some seals you prick," absolute stormer. Lisa HINDLE. (18/02/03) 410.
At the game on Saturday against Leeds United sitting in my usual place
in the Street end. Anyway halfway through the game we started singing
to the Leeds Players “You’re getting sold in the morning” then after
we had stopped singing someone from behind me shouts “Cheap as chips!”
which had everyone around in stitches. Great laugh. keep up the good
work your site is excellent. Many thanks, Damien McKay. (18/02/03) 408. This fella behind me today shouted 'go,ed Stubbsey lad bazooka that viduka' Creevy. (18/02/03) 407. At the Leeds game. Everton were 1-0 up thanks to a David Unsworth penalty. Alan Smith makes a harsh tackle on one of our players, and the ref blows for a free-kick. Smith goes off in a huff and then all of a sudden the street end starts singing 'YOU'RE GETTING SOLD IN THE MORNING, SOLD IN THE MORNING..............'.i couldn't believe it. I was in stitches and everyone started clapping them. Terry Venables even had a little smile on his face. Pure class (but I don't think Ridsdale appreciated it!!). great site keep the hard work up. CHRIS J. Naso Azurro (David Clark), Karen, Mark Barrett. (18/02/03) 406. At the Leeds game, robinson is taking a goal kick at the Gwladys Street end, some fella shouts ' Hey Robbo, they've sold your Team Bus, you've got to fucking walk home'. quality... mick h. (18/02/03) 405.
Bolton away 28/1/02 'we're all singing 'li tie, there's only only
1 li tie' fella turns round and says, 'i thought there was fuckin
3 billion of them'. paul askew. (11/02/03) 403.
I was sat with some friends at the Everton Arsenal match a few years
ago, they won one nil when Overmars scored due to a mistake by the
honey monster. Pembridge was having a nightmare on the left, didn't
find a blue shirt all day, in frustration, he gratuitously kicked
Lee Dixon (not a bad idea), the schoolmaster from Harrow approached
him and was about to brandish a yellow card, some wag shouted, "Please,
send him off!". We all collapsed, it was worth the entry fee.
Kev Gillen. (11/02/03) 401. There is a guy who sits infront of us on lower Gwladys, an i think he is a bit slow, An during a game early this season, Campbell has the ball about 30yards from there goal, 4 passes later it ends up at Wrights feet, this guy stands up an shouts out, Don't pass it back Wrighty, Go forward!! to which everyone who heard pisses themselves laffin, an the guys thinks there laughin at him!! Classic! Adam an Gilb. (11/02/03) |Jogger's
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